Truth

Okay, so now I’m a day late and the story is four days old. So very much happened today. I’ve been inundated with odd, strange, perplexing and am overwhelmed. I threw myself into “work” on Friday and made a delicious Indian spiced chickpea and fire roasted tomato soup. Seriously. Watered all of the plants. Finished the laundry including putting it away. Washed the dishes – twice – and put them away. I accomplished sooooo much. Just not much reading OR writing. Which leaves me feeling unfinished.  

But at the end of the day, I thanked the Lord for keeping me on task and completing more than I would normally require for myself. Including driving to the grocery store – thrice! I thanked Him because while I kept myself busy, my mind did not stray. As the current Sunday School song states, “Never be lazy, but work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically.” Am I turning a new leaf? 

The story: I’m a librarian. A children’s librarian. In library school you learn about the proper way to direct the “reference question.” Sometimes the patron knows exactly what they want, but are unable or unwilling to explain themselves. Sometimes the patron isn’t sure of what they want, and it’s the librarian’s job to help them discover it. Regardless, we have to dig for information so that we are able to supply the patron with the material they require. We certainly don’t want them to leave disappointed or empty-handed. 

So I overheard a reference assist. I couldn’t stop myself from listening… The adult male was asking for a series of books for which he didn’t have any of the pertinent information – exact title, author - that kind of stuff. The librarian, amazingly, found them with the aid of our online catalog. Unfortunately, the library didn’t own them, but we could request them from another library for him. 

The patron was very excited to request them and handed over his library card. Unfortunately, it was expired. To which he replied, he no longer lived in the city limits perhaps we should try his new card from a local library. Bingo! 

Except that he had already requested the books… according to the system – not the man. The librarian explained that we couldn’t make them come any quicker. He would just have to wait. 

Well, that was fine, he had just requested them that morning at his local library. He had just hoped that we had them and he could get them sooner. The librarian explained that he could get them sooner if he went to the library that owned them. He was more than willing. 

But only one library was public, the rest were school libraries. He could only get one that very day, but he better call ahead in case it was already pulled for him. It might go into transit in the meantime. He wouldn’t want to waste a trip. 

It occurred to me, listening, that if he just would have come out and spoke the truth from the get go, the whole conversation could have been reduced to a few simple clicks. Later the librarian pointed out to me that had he asked at his local library, they could have told him everything he needed to know without ever driving into town. 

Why do they make it so difficult? Patrons. Men. (lol). It’s like pulling teeth. What do they have to lose by withholding the truth? Lying really. And it all came out in the open in the end anyway. 

And then I recalled that I sometimes, often, operate in the same way. I avoid the truth. Why? I’m not precisely sure. Maybe because the truth doesn’t seem good enough. Why do I have to provide an excuse and often a made up one? Why does that seem better? 

How many hours do we waste because we refuse to be open, honest, vulnerable? Why do we speak the untruths? I think the guy was playing dumb. I don’t think that’s what I do. Either I try to be nice and polite and considerate. I don’t want to hurt anyone. Or I want to lend more weight, credence to my side of the story. 

Anyway. It was a funny story. To a librarian. But I ended up pointing four fingers back at myself even as I pointed one at him. 

It’s much too late to write. I’m tired and flushed. Right now I want to be romanced by God. I’m intrigued. I’m looking back at the times He sent me Love Messages and I didn’t recognize them for what they were. Now I want to ask for more and hope to see them… 

Hear, O daughter, and consider, and incline your ear:
forget your people and your father’s house,
and the king will desire your beauty.

Since he is your lord, bow to him.
Psalm 45:10-11 (ESV) 

And there was my first! Thank you Lord Jesus.