Chapter 5 – Breathing In – Part 4

But it is the spirit in a man, the breath of the Almighty, that gives him understanding.
Job 32:8

Exercise 4: “If only… I would…”

“If time and money were not an object, I would take myself to… Everywhere. There isn’t a place I wouldn’t go. I’ve always wanted to go to Iceland. But I would love to go most anywhere. Try everything. Castles and pyramids. Oceans and skies.

“If time and money were not an object, I would buy myself… a studio. An art studio. And different types of paint. And every color and every brush. And I’d shop the glass store and buy every kind I was attracted to. And I’d have my own kiln. Or maybe a house on a large piece of land with an art studio on the land, but separate from the house.

“If time and money were not an object, I would learn how to… play every instrument with honest to goodness lessons. Music in the morning. Art in the afternoon. Or vice versa. Have to fit the writing in somewhere. I guess I would never sleep.

“If time and money were not an object, I would give myself the gift of… housekeepers, personal chef, personal trainer … hahaha. Chauffeur? When left to my own devices, I sometimes forget to eat… Someone to bring me my food and snacks and drinks would be lovely. Of course it would all be healthy too!

“If time and money were not an object, I would give someone I love… The ability to do what they want and not what that must do. Go to school. Be an artist. Travel. Have more time off to do what they love to do too.

That was fun. What I want most? Art studio and then personal chef!!

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
Romans 15:13

They sacrifice on the tops of the mountains and burn offerings on the hills, under oak, poplar, and terebinth, because their shade is good. Therefore your daughters play the whore, and your brides commit adultery.

Hosea 4:13 (ESV)

Chapter 5 – Breathing In – Part 3

But it is the spirit in a man, the breath of the Almighty, that gives him understanding.
Job 32:8

Exercise 3: Out of the Blue

Where do you get your creative ideas? Is there a certain place or a certain activity that seems to provide the right conditions for ideas to come to you? Does it happen while you sleep? In the car? While walking or showering? Write about a time when you received an inspiration “Out of the blue.” If you can’t think of a specific instance, write about the time, place, and conditions that seem to be most conducive to the “Aha!” experience.

I usually get my ideas when I’m walking and sometimes running. When I walk the dog, it is about a 10 to 12 minute meander around the block. Sometimes I start out by talking to God, but it doesn’t generally stay that way. Sometimes I get frustrated and angry. But I think it is when I’m distracted, that I’m hit with ideas. Most likely because I have cleared my mind. It is like looking at one of those hidden pictures. In order to see the picture, you must unfocus, which seems counterproductive. It might just be that, otherwise, I try too hard.

I also notice that once my mind is wrapped around a creative idea, I tend to forget the task at hand. The next thing I know, I am home. Or I have conquered that hill that always disheartens me.

Once, I had pulled into the parking lot at work, and as I was getting my stuff out of the passenger side, I was hit with an idea. I don’t remember thinking about the problem prior to the moment I was struck. And once I had the idea, it was like a decision had been made and I got to work that evening.

I think I’ve told my aha moment here before. I was walking the dog and I had approached the corner of Forest and Linden. Almost home. I remember it was a Sunday and I was trying to put finishing thoughts on my Sunday School lesson. The Children’s Ministry was supporting the Storybook Program, so books were playing heavily into what I was doing. And clear as day, I “heard” I’ve been gifted with the ability to know books. Read them and remember them so that I can pass them on. But God wants me to know his people in such a way.

Now, it wasn’t a voice, and there weren’t words. I’m just describing the best that I can. I felt uplifted and praised like a child who has done a good job. A job that I sometimes feel guilty about. But I was given a greater view of God’s plan for me. It’s relational. It’s about His people.

This doesn’t seem like a creative idea that turned into something. But it was an answer to something I was thinking about, but hadn’t asked the right question. I believe that day was a good Children’s “sermon”. I hope that I sufficiently got the point across …

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
Romans 15:13

“I saw in the visions of my head as I lay in bed, and behold, a watcher, a holy one, came down from heaven.”

Daniel 4:13 (ESV)

Chapter 5 – Breathing In – Part 2

But it is the spirit in a man, the breath of the Almighty, that gives him understanding.
Job 32:8

Exercise 2: Quickwrite

Write for ten minutes without pausing. List everything that inspires you, that breathes life into you, that kindles the creative fires. Choose one or two and describe these special inspirational sources in detail. What makes them so powerful to you?

Truly powerful music. I can feel it deep down in my soul. Timpani and cymbals and trumpets. Loud and increasing. It makes me shake. Sometimes I’m so overwhelmed, I cannot even breathe. When I pull out the stops on the organ and the music is huge, I shake. I can barely play. It’s too much. Sometimes the music makes me smile so big, I can no longer sing along. Some music is so tender and touching that I cannot sing along and it brings me to tears.

Sometimes a conversation can stir me up. The kind where you begin to feed off of one another. It’s like you’re stoking the fires. Each idea leads to something new and different and bigger. Another person can add an idea or word that changes an entire concept. If you think enough alike, wow. I can feel the heat and I am flushed.

The night sky is overwhelming. If I think too long upon it, I begin to worry that I will fly off of this planet and get lost. Breathtaking, and so many places to go.

Smells can take me places. They should. We’re wired that way. I went somewhere the other day and it smelled like my old library and I was transported to a whole other world.

New stuff, supplies are inspiring. Someone donates a bagful of used fabric or old wallpaper and see … well Cinderella going to the ball. Textures, embossed felt, are rich and inviting. They can make a board luxurious.

Raptors flying through the sky. Their wings, so wide. They soar. Like kings of the air. I saw a Bald Eagle in flight in the natural world and it was a good thing I wasn’t driving.

Animals. Large animals. A deer. A lion. Up close. I’m enthralled. I swear, I’d let a lion devour me. If I could tangle my arms, fingers in the mane of a lion. I’d be done. I think C. S. Lewis would agree.

Old architecture. Medieval cathedrals. Enormous works of art and labor and love. Make me feel so insignificant, and yet it was people like me that did it.

Art … some … There is a show on broadway called War Horses, I think. The horses are amazing and industrial looking and functional and rideable. And so real looking. The actors that move them are amazing. So very very lifelike. I stood transfixed. You lost the actors and were entirely intent upon the horse. And it is a puppet! I just cannot imagine who could stand to work so hard and so intently on such perfection. For such a short life-span. I hope the horses are put in a museum.

I’m trying to determine if reading inspires me. Some stories can move me to tears. Some stories can transport me. I’m guessing yes. But rarely if ever do they take my breath away and leave me helpless. A movie might. Very visual. Listening to a book has. The power of the voice! I think I’m downplaying my very own imagination.

Ahhh, Entirely forgot. Colors. After all, I am the Crayola Girl. Intense, vibrant colors. I cannot believe, (sorry), that anyone would choose to wear black all the time unless it is a statement – artsy, gothic, emotic. God did not dress the fields in black now did He? Do purple and orange go together outside of school colors. Uh, YEAH! Crocus? Iris? Fish? People say black, brown, navy blue, khaki and grey are neutrals. Have you checked out God’s neutrals? Green and Blue?

Words. Yes, words. I love them. How they sound. The shape of them. Put them together alliteratively. Like music. Add them to music and what could be better? Life should be a musical. Yes, I’d subscribe to that. Why not?

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
Romans 15:13

And the Lord said, “Thus shall the people of Israel eat their bread unclean, among the nations where I will drive them.”

Ezekiel 4:13 (ESV)

Chapter 5 – Breathing In – Part 1

But it is the spirit in a man, the breath of the Almighty, that gives him understanding.
Job 32:8

Exercise 1: Invocation of the Holy Spirit

Write a personal invocation to the Holy Spirit. The purpose of this prayer will be to call forth his creative, enlightening power whenever you begin to create, just as the classical writers did. The prayer should also remind you to offer yourself as a servant to the artist work God wants you to do. This will be your Artist Prayer, which you can use to get started, to keep going, and to get past the inevitable blocks as you pursue your art.

Divine Spirit, Holy Inspiration, Heavenly Breath,

Fill me to bursting with Your Presence.

Grant me the Faith to receive You in abundance.

Speak on my behalf in the language of the righteous.

Reveal the wonders and mysteries of Your Truth

Instruct me in the use of my God-given talents for Your Glory and Praise

I offer myself, broken, poor and miniscule though I be, to be your tool

Demonstrate Your Might through my weakness

Shine Your Light through the gifts You have given me.

And lead me to point the way to the Father, the Lamb most worthy of all praise, and to you the Wind who scours me.

The Flame who purifies me.

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
Romans 15:13

This was for the sins of her prophets and the iniquities of her priests, who shed in the midst of her the blood of the righteous.

Lamentations 4:13 (ESV)

Chapter 4 – Forgiving – Part 5

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
Colossians 3:13

Exercise 5: Act of Contrition

Write a prayer asking for forgiveness for not trusting your dreams and visions to “the Father of the heavenly lights.”  End your prayer with a firm resolve to begin to seek God’s vision for you and to trust in his ability to help you achieve that vision.

I could sit here and write a magnificent prayer, but it would be a hollow activity. Even if I were to write it in a safe place away from visiting eyes, it would be an “act”. This is no more than a 12 step plan that won’t actually fix things. It is all so much deeper than this. The brokenness that I feel. The brokenness that I see. It is heartbreaking.

I was astonished by a question. “On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you enjoy this?” I was speechless. I didn’t see it coming. I didn’t have a good answer. “It’s better than the alternative. I’d rather be doing this than something else. I’d rather be here than elsewhere.”

As long as I was at church for Easter preparation and Easter services, I was all right and happy and cheerful. As soon as I left, well, it wasn’t Easter.

Not to say that all of Easter preparation and Easter services was perfect and pure either.

Another person described to me the lack of support. There is no one that has your back. There is no one to uplift you. There is no one to pray for you individually. There was a moment when I thought that I was being cared for … and then things got strange and uncomfortable.

There are a lot of people quick to tear you down in their effort to build themselves up or deflect the light away from themselves. And there are a lot of people who can be drawn to your light who choose to suck it away.

Lifeboat mentality.

I keep searching for the moment when I get this right. I’ve mentioned trying to walk up the down the escalator. Well, it’s more like I’ve fallen off. And people keep walking by without even seeing the fact that there is something wrong. And the few that I’ve try to talk to … well, I think people jump to conclusions. I was worried that I just wasn’t communicating well. I no longer think that is the problem. More likely, people jump to conclusions and don’t listen to the story in its entirety.

People are looking for my broken arm or leg or the bump on my head. Forget it. I’m physically healthy. I’m even mentally close to okay. But spiritually? The part that cannot be seen?

Ah, here I am. It’s all about me. Stop thinking about my own problems. Pay attention to the problems of those around me. And seek God and His plans for me at every moment.

Most Heavenly Father, forgive me for avoiding you. Forgive me for trying to maintain some semblance of control. Forgive me for daydreaming and not dreaming. Forgive me for not trusting you. Forgive me for making you into being just like everyone else. Forgive me for wanting support and love from the broken when you are there, always, with open arms and completion.

Please be with me today. In my every moment. Show me how I can keep my ear open to you and in my every action, thought, word. Lead me into a new dream. A new vision. A dream of you and eternal, holy life. Bring me away from the shadows. Protect me. Let your light shine through me. Prevent my shadows from consuming me and those around me. Let my happiness be You. I want You to be my hope.

Amen.

Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.
Luke 6:37

Behold, he comes up like clouds; his chariots like the whirlwind; his horses are swifter than eagles – woe to us, for we are ruined!

Jeremiah 4:13 (ESV)

Chapter 4 – Forgiving – Part 4

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
Colossians 3:13

Exercise 4: Dreamers and Doers

Respond to each of these questions by writing true or false.

1.     FALSE – When I was a child, I had a specific dream of what I wanted to become when I grew up. If this is true for you, what was that dream? Considering that I said I wanted to be a librarian when I was 5, you would think I could say true here. But that would be wrong. I wanted to do multiple things throughout my life. I guess that hasn’t changed. I get bored so quickly and easily.

2.    TRUE – I remember at least one teacher who encouraged me to be more or do more than I believed I could do or be. If this is true for you, who was that teacher? I say true because if I say false, you would know I was lying. However, I cannot name a teacher who did this. I would think I would remember it. I remember being praised for doing something well or right, but I don’t remember being encouraged to do more or be more. No one ever said I could go far with such and so.

3.    TRUE – When I was in school, I felt successful in one or more specific areas. If this is true for you, in what areas were you successful? Academics. I rarely had to work to receive good grades. Most everything came naturally to me. High school was a breeze and college wasn’t much harder. Busy work.

4.    FALSE – I grew up believing that God has a plan for my life; my job was to seek his will for me and make sure my vision was in line with his. If this is true for you, what is your understanding of God’s plan for your life? You would probably think this would be true as well. I’m discovering that even in this, I am a people pleaser. I was probably taught this, but it didn’t hold at home. I was taught to be self-sufficient and independent at home. To have a career to support myself. And to stay close. I think parents tend to drown out God. Kind of – you’re learning this at school (parochial), but in the real world, it doesn’t work that way.

5.    FALSE – To some extent, I pursued my youthful vision into adulthood. If this is true for you, what aspect of your dream did you follow? Wow. Me of all people. Never had a vision for myself. Never had a dream. I’m just a daydreamer. Daydreaming of being anywhere but where I am.

6.    TRUE – I have recently developed or rekindled a specific vision for my life. If this is true for you, explain how you are keeping the dream alive? Well, I thought I had. Lots of people have visions for me, but I don’t get excited about them. I was excited about a certain thing, but I guess no one else saw me in that way. So now I’m bored. That happens A LOT. I’m trying to explore to see what brings me joy. My fear is that I’ll have to take it elsewhere to be allowed to do what I get excited to do. So this was true two years ago and it is false now.

Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.
Luke 6:37

There is no Isaiah 4:13

Chapter 4 – Forgiving – Part 3

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
Colossians 3:13

Exercise 3: My Heroes

Make a list of all the people who have in any way inspired or encouraged you to believe in yourself as an artist. Include other artists whom you admire or whose work encourages you.

There’s a lovely librarian who I wouldn’t have been able to describe until this moment. Now I have the word. She is a nurturer. I don’t think I was ever able to understand that word until right now. The dictionary that is my mind finally put the two together. She nurtures me. We don’t know one another well, but she has cataloged my abilities – she’s a librarian too, remember? – and she knows what I have done in the past and knows how I could be used in the future. And she asks. She is assertive. Another word that I’m finally starting to wrap my understanding around. She will ask, and you simply cannot say no. You might grumble about it, but in the end, you want to do your best for her. You certainly don’t want to disappoint her. And when your task is complete, there is praise. Sincere praise. Believable praise. And you know when she comes around again … you’ll want to hide, but it is better all around if you just say yes!

There are times when I end up doing something that feels both ridiculous and right at the same time. It’s okay when you work with kids. They get it. Kind of an uncensored joy and wild abandon when the grownup rules are lifted. Times when you just want to force the adults and spoil sports out of the room so you can be free. And there is a sweet and kind and encouraging woman, who loves it when I do it. She’s not embarrassed by it. She’d love to join in. And she always makes me feel guilt free afterwards, while the other adults are grumbling and talking, she’s right there with me – getting it. Without her encouragement, I probably would have stopped. The naysayers are quite vocal.

There are several people who claim to enjoy what I write and what I say. They say I have the gift of language. Perhaps that is the hardest praise for me to hear. I have the hardest time getting my thoughts and ideas across. I stumble and have to repeat myself often. Sometimes I’m still not understood. And for the most part, I get the feeling that people would like to hear less of me. Probably see less of me too. But occasionally, I’ll be pushed to get it out of my system and I’m rewarded with acceptance. My favorite is, “preach it, girl.”

I could go on and on with my list of encouragers. I find there are many. I wrote a series of essays to build myself up once upon a time. I need to find them and read them again. For some reason, I feel that I’m not liked. In reality, I am. I had a devotion this morning that said, “When you feel Satan’s arrows of accusation, you are probably on the right track.” I’ve been giving in to the guilt. Where are my shield and my sword?

I find it interesting that when I sit to ponder which artists inspire me, they are always authors. Tolkien, Lewis, L’Engle, Lowry, Hale, Oppel, Westerfeld, Herbert, Jordan, Auel, Miller … I could go on and on and on and on. That’s who I want to be like. Close seconds are the musicians. The people who put the words to the music … I think I need to go back to my Narnia.

Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.
Luke 6:37

Your shoots are an orchard of pomegranates with all choicest fruits, henna with nard…

Song of Solomon 4:13 (ESV)

Chapter 4 – Forgiving – Part 2

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
Colossians 3:13

Exercise 2: Getting Uppity with Downers

For each of the discouraging statements below, write some back talk that refutes it. For example:

(Downer) “You should be doing something worthwhile with your time.”

(Uppity comeback) “If my art enriches someone else’s life – or my own – then it is worthwhile.”

(Downer) “You should be doing something worthwhile with your time.”

(Uppity comeback) You tell me what would be a more worthwhile use of my time and I’ll tell you why it’s an inefficient use of my time.

(Downer) “Nobody will take your art seriously.”

(Uppity comeback) You think I’m a serious?

(Downer) “You’ll never make a living at your art.”

(Uppity comeback) My art isn’t about making a living. My art is about LIVING!

(Downer) “You don’t have enough talent to be a(n)         .”

(Uppity comeback) There will always be someone better than me, but God will always provide a place for me and a purpose for my talent.

Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.
Luke 6:37

Better was a poor and wise youth than an old and foolish king who no longer knew how to take advice.

Ecclesiastes 4:13 (ESV)

Chapter 4 – Forgiving – Part 1

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
Colossians 3:13

Exercise 1: Forgiving as God Forgives Us

Choose a person from the list of “discouragers” you made. Write a letter telling the person what he or she did (or neglected to do) that discouraged you in your dream of becoming an artist. Tell the person what you remember, how it made you feel then, and maybe even how it still makes you feel. Explain that you are forgiving them to free yourself from resentment, not because whatever they did was right or understandable.

Dear “names withheld”,

            You sat in the audience with a frown. You looked annoyed and put out. Or you never even came. You never chose to see or hear. It was too much trouble to make the effort. You never encouraged me to do more. You never suggested I try. Your silence was all I noticed and it hurt. My dreams and visions were inconveniences if they were even acknowledged. Money was always an obstacle. I’m still “playing”. I still have hobbies. They should be extras instead of priorities. You put my efforts down openly to others in front of me.

            I don’t feel like an artist. And if I am, it certainly isn’t important or vital to my being. I still feel pushed to do something more worthwhile or useful even if it drains me and burns me out. I always feel guilty when I’m doing something creative. “Crafty things” have to be done on the side. They won’t be paid for or reimbursed. I hide what I do and my excitement for it so that it won’t be put down. I do things on my own time, because I don’t want to be reprimanded for wasting other’s time. Or worse - stopped ... prevented.

            I want to forgive you and move on, but the wounds are so fresh. I’m not ready to free myself from resentment. Just when I’m starting to see what I could be … I’m held back because of my anger and hurt and frustration. And you don’t even know what I’m capable of with just a little encouragement.

            Spirit, please speak on my behalf. You know what I need to break free. I need some love. For what I could be and not just for what I was. It’s all a mask. Please, help me to forgive. I need freedom. It’s not worth anymore of my time.

Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgive.
Luke 6:37

Keep hold of instruction; do not let go; guard her, for she is your life.

Proverbs 4:13 (ESV)

Chapter 3 – Awakening – Part 5

All who are skilled among you are to come and make everything the Lord has commanded.
Exodus 35:10

Exercise 5: Take One Baby Step Forward

Draw a picture, write a poem or essay, or shoot a roll of film. Practice a musical piece, fix your instrument. Buy some supplies. The Lord is waiting to see your efforts so he can bless you. I’m really not that far off. I practice piano/organ up to 6 hours each week and never less than 4. I write for at least half an hour nearly every day. I bought supplies last week. I’m going to be painting very very soon and intensely. My mind is designing a display for the library’s summer reading program coming up. I have another display to put up soon. And a third that I’m not ready to tackle yet. I’ve got additional musical practices coming up and I’m rehearsing for a short skit. I’ve learned my lines and I go over them in my head in spare moments. I sing whenever I get the chance. I prepare to “preach” weekly. If anything, I’m taking a break this week. So what is it I’m just not getting? Why do I feel that I’m not doing enough? Why do I feel that I’m not an artist?

How did you get past one “If only … I would.” I’m moving towards a solution. I need a portable laptop. I am going to get the new laptop. I’m not sure when. I’m trying to be patient. Next I had to argue the portability question. My mind is even having difficulty wrapping around the idea of being portable. Right now, I read when I’m in between places. But what if I could write in the in between times. If my laptop were portable, I would NOT be typing HERE. I don’t have privacy. I might stay in bed to type. I might type before falling asleep …

This week I took the following small step: Argued for portability.

Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.
Proverbs 16:3

Psalms 4:13 doesn't exist ...

Chapter 3 – Awakening – Part 4

All who are skilled among you are to come and make everything the Lord has commanded.
Exodus 35:10

Exercise 4: What I Need

Make a list of what you need to begin practicing your art. What do you really need? Time? A place to paint? Supplies? A new flute? Money for a refresher course? The courage to join a writers’ group? Voice lessons?

I need a better laptop. I need a private space of my own to work. I need the guts, direction and money to get real lessons. I think I need the desire to decide what I truly want to focus on. There are so many things that I want to do. But I should perhaps pick the one that I most want. To choose to do one thing well … I don’t know if I’m willing …What would bring me the most joy?

This computer is trash and I’m tired of dealing with it!

Give the Lord an opportunity to demonstrate his interest in you and his power to help you realize your dreams: Ask God for what you need and see what you will receive.

Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.
Proverbs 16:3

“Amid thoughts from visions of the night, when deep sleep falls on men…”

Job 4:13 (ESV)

Chapter 3 – Awakening – Part 3

All who are skilled among you are to come and make everything the Lord has commanded.
Exodus 35:10

Exercise 3: Trust in the Lord

Fill in the blanks with whatever comes to mind. Elaborate on one of your responses.

If I could trust in the Lord’s provision, I would … I don’t know. I try to trust. I try to do what I feel led to do and it goes nowhere. I do what I’m told. I do what I’m asked. I feel used with little glimpses of lovely.

If I could trust in the Lord’s provision, I would … I don’t know. I try to be creative. I try to do things that I am good at. But the opportunities are far and few between. I wait and I wait and I wait and little by little, it all gets whittled away.

If I could trust in the Lord’s provision, I would … I don’t know. I don’t know what that looks like. Where am I supposed to look? Who is going to help? Who is going to be willing to take me on? Before I self-destruct.

Am I crashed after my high? This is going to be a problem. I must have crashed and burned. That is what I feel like. Wreckage.

Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.
Proverbs 16:3

Then Mordecai told them to reply to Esther, “Do not think to yourself that in the king’s palace you will escape any more than all the other Jews.”

Esther 4:13 (ESV)

Chapter 3 – Awakening – Part 2

All who are skilled among you are to come and make everything the Lord has commanded.
Exodus 35:10

Exercise 2: Called by Name

Read Exodus 35:30-35. What do you think it means that the Bible includes not only the names of great kings, warriors, and prophets, but also the names of artists who worked on the place where the very Word of God, the Ten Commandments, was to be kept?

The body has many parts and they all work together. Not everyone can be a king or warrior or prophet. And not everyone can be an artist. We are all important. And God should have our best. God wanted the best they had to give to build the place where His name would be kept. He very deliberately chose David to be King. God very deliberately chose the one who would best create the place for His Glory.

Only WE seek to be politically correct and try to give everyone a chance to glorify God in every possible way. Only WE like to seem FAIR. Only WE say that there are many jobs and many workers. WE would not wish to single anyone in particular out.

How have you used and/or hidden your talents in your life? What key events or periods of your life influenced how you either developed or hid your talents?

I wouldn’t say that I have hidden them. I might have ignored them for a while when other life events took the stage. Going to college. Starting a family. I would say that I am in my renaissance. I’m coming back. I am getting comfortable with the person I have become. I am starting to recognize the artist. I am falling into my element. Things are starting to click. I am wishing to come out of retirement. I need to make time …

Perhaps hidden is the wrong word for me. I might have been withholding … And I think that might be for self-preservation!

Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.
Proverbs 16:3

So in the lowest parts of the space behind the wall, in open places, I stationed the people by their clans, with their swords, their spears, and their bows.

Nehemiah 4:13 (ESV)

Chapter 3 – Awakening – Part 1

All who are skilled among you are to come and make everything the Lord has commanded.
Exodus 35:10

Exercise 1: Visions and Longings

What were your favorite things to do when you were a child? Mentally put yourself into different venues. Try to remember the activities you really loved and looked forward to doing.

I loved to pretend. And daydream. Outside. The world was my Narnia. I could travel to ALL of the planets on my grandmother’s outside swing. I could drive anywhere I wanted on my grandpa’s riding lawn mower. The pasture lane was a bridge to a fantasy world. My favorite place to play was always Allerton Park. A real fantasy land.

When I got older, if I wasn’t reading, I was daydreaming. Long car trips were special occasions.

When my cousin and I got together, there was one phrase that our parents probably wanted to beat out of us, “I want to make something.” Give us crayons, paint, staplers, tissues, glue – we were content.

In Girl Scouts, we learned how to dance with sticks … four girls beat out the rhythm with the sticks, while a couple of us danced in between them. Very much like jump rope, but oh so much more fun in my opinion. LOVED doing that. Or singing silly songs around the campfire.

During recess, my friends and I were always known for making up stories to play. We’d play a game until the entire class was involved, and then we would quit and start a new game with just the three or four of us again. A never-ending cycle.

Learning something new was always something to look forward to. You would learn a routine and then move on to the next piece. Once you had all the moves – polish it off. Lovely. Precision.

Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.
Proverbs 16:3

Now be it known to the king that if this city is rebuilt and the walls finished, they will not pay tribute, custom, or toll, and the royal revenue will be impaired.

Ezra 4:13 (ESV)

Chapter 2 – Listening – Part 5

In the morning, O Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation.
Psalm 5:3

Exercise 5: Favorite Words

List all your favorite words:

1.     Cacophony

2.    Catastrophe

3.    Onomatopoeia

4.    Kaleidoscopic

5.    Chrysanthemum

6.    Verdigris

7.     Ambergris

8.    Molten

9.    Volcanic

10. Cupcake

11.  Cocoa

12. Seussical

13. Platypus

14. Sensuous

15. Seismic

16. Gargantuan

17.  Oriental

18. Melodic

19. Provocative

20.          Plethora

21. Pomegranate

22.Diaphanous

23.Décolletage

24.Naïveté

25.Delightful

26.Extraordinary

27. Fragrant

28.          Croissant

29.Lollipop

30.          Quizzical

31. Aubergine (SP?)

32.Violet

May the words of my mouth and the mediation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.
Psalm 19:14

And the 400 pomegranates for the two latticeworks, two rows of pomegranates for each latticework, to cover the two bowls of the capitals that were on the pillars.

2 Chronicles 4:13 (ESV)