Foolishness

For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.
Romans 8:3-4 (ESV)

Ever have a vision? Ever have a vision and want to share it? Ever have a vision and long to try it?

Ever discover that members of your team have a different vision or no vision?

How about having a purpose and a goal in mind only to find that the people in power have programs to plan – programs that don’t interest you? Programs that will suck the life out of you rather than fill you. Programs that will run you ragged for weeks and be over within an hour.

Before I go farther, I am NOT saying that I am right, nor am I saying that THEY are wrong. But we are different. And it is so lovely to work with like-minded people. It is also delightful to work as a complimentary team made up of different-minded people. It is infuriating to work with a clique – especially a well-oiled one. You simply cannot get in a word, let alone a thought.

Example… you go to a meeting and 2 hours is spent on the menu when there is more to the event than lunch. And you happen not to be blessed with the gift of hospitality.

Example… you are unhappy with the content of a program, but the other person is unhappy with the length when the length doesn’t affect that person at all.

Even worse is when most of the events are planned outside of the team. Why even bother with the team. There is the “official” team and then there is the “actual” team. And if you aren’t invited to be a part of the “actual” team, there is really little reason to be on the “official” team. Except that they can use you.

I must have woken up on the snarky side of the bed.

So, my grievance? I’m not really sure. I’m angry. I’m mad. And I’m hurt. I want out. And I got out. And now I’m trying to act like I haven’t been hurt. Like it doesn’t bother me. Sin of pride? I’m better than you? When in reality I’ve been made to feel like I’m not good enough?

I started working on this one a while ago. I started saying “no.” And I’m getting good at it. Which brings up another character flaw. I am not a quitter, and by saying “no” I don’t want to be viewed as a quitter. Under different circumstances, I wouldn’t have quit. Sometimes people just have to go separate ways when their goals are different. Maybe even their goals are the same, but their means are conflicting.

Does any of this make any sense? I’m not doing a very good job. Very ill indeed. I want to be a Godly woman, but I don’t want to be a flibbertyjibbet. Flibbertyjibbets look like scatterbrains whether they are or not. Please shoot me if I ever come off as a flibbertyjibbet.

I pray that I care less about what others think of me and more about what God thinks of me.

Some people just have WAY TOO much time on their hands. I’m one of them.

The way of a fool is right in his own eyes,
but a wise man listens to advice.
The vexation of a fool is known at once,
but the prudent ignores an insult.
Proverbs 12:15-16 (ESV)

I am always the fool and sometimes I am wise, but it is only your wisdom through me. Grant me the wisdom to recognize the difference.