Chapter 6 – Forget About His Will for Your Life

I had an interview at the University of Illinois and it was one of those all day jobs. I had to meet with everyone. At one point I was in an office one on one with a woman who wanted to know where I saw myself in five years and then in ten years. I think I probably laughed. And I know I didn’t give her the kind of answer she wanted. I could have told her what she wanted to hear, but instead I told her the truth.

How could anyone possibly know where they were going to be in ten, even five years? I might be dead tomorrow. I certainly had never intended on being out of a job either. That certainly wasn’t in my plan. For that matter, it was never my plan to be an academic, medical, corporate librarian either. I definitely didn’t strive to be a part time paraprofessional children’s librarian.

I am in the job I am because it was God’s plan for me. It was the best option for my family even though there was no way I could have known that myself. I was forced to take the job. But it was the best possible thing that could have happened. I never would have known how much I adore children’s librarianship if I had been left to my own devices and plans.

We are so blessed that God doesn’t sit us down and ask us for a 5-year or 10-year plan. We should be grateful that God doesn’t sit us down and tell us our 5-year or 10-year plan. Even though that is what some of us would like. Some of us would prefer for God to tell us what we are here for. We want to know so that we can do it right. OR we like the fact that we don’t know, just in case we’ve gotten it horribly wrong.

I have come to terms with the fact that God isn’t going to tell me specifically what to do. He has given me plenty of choices and options. He has blessed me with various and lovely gifts. He has given me an intelligent, functioning brain. There is so very much that I can do. And God has left it up to me, as a free-thinking, unique individual to decide what I want to do with His blessings myself.

What I am struggling with is doing them. To the best of my ability. In every possible moment. In every possibly way. To His Glory. I need to learn to live moment by moment, trusting in Him and letting Him lead me. Then there is no worry or anxiety for the future. And there is His joy that gives me my strength. And someday I will know His peace.

About 40,000 ready for war passed over before the Lord for battle, to the plains of Jericho.
 Joshua 4:13 (ESV)