A Dee Dah Day

So I said that I would train in the spiritual discipline of prayer. Strike that. Not that it shouldn’t be addressed, but I think I have something more important to correct first.

Chapter 4 is about the spiritual discipline of JOY. And I have realized in the past few months that my JOY is gone. I didn’t even really realize when it left me. I couldn’t really pinpoint why it left me. But I know without a doubt that I’ve lost it and I don’t know where to find it.

In this chapter, the author talks about people who are joy-carriers. Some people are just naturally joyful people. I am NOT saying I was ever one of those people. But there was a time when perhaps I was known as being a happy person, someone who always wore a smile, someone you could count upon to be in a good mood. And now – I’M NOT.

Someone did steal my smile. Someone questioned my smile. So I started to question my smile. And I stopped trusting my own smile. I was led to believe that I couldn’t always be happy. So I think I bought into an idea that I wasn’t happy – that I was a fraud.

And you know what? Sometimes the simple act of smiling makes you feel better. It turns on the happy hormones. It fills your brain with the good juice. And pretty soon, you are smiling not because you’re faking it, but because you truly are happier than when you weren’t smiling.

Another trick is dressing to make you feel better. Put on a bright color. Dress up. Wear your favorite outfit. Defer from the black.

Yet another trick is standing up straight and tall and proud. Holding yourself as if you are important and you don’t mind standing out. Um, that would be displaying confidence. Walk as though you have a purpose. Act as though what you’re doing is important. Give a firm handshake. Make eye contact.

There’s a part of me right now shrinking from all of that because it sounds like “ME, ME, ME, ME.” And we’ve heard the sermon “It’s not about me” often enough. But there is a continuum from “I am a wretched, poor sinner undeserving of any good thing.” and “I am a creature designed by God and purchased and won by the blood of my Lord and Savior.” We are not worthy in and of ourselves, but Christ has made us worthy and we deny Him when we do not celebrate His creation and His sacrifice of which we are included.

The author points out that God commanded feasts to be celebrated in Old Testament times. Do I ever feast?

He also points out that God is most joyful of all. God is the be all end all of JOY. Not that he doesn’t know sorrow. He knows sorrow far above ours for He knows ours as well as all others in addition to His own.

If I am made in His image, it is my duty to be JOYFUL! I do NOT have to be ashamed of my JOY either. Aren’t we supposed to be JOYFUL ALWAYS?

And so I have decided to get my JOY back. I will train for JOY. I will celebrate. The first step is to smile again. I’m tired of revealing my wounds through my eyes. I want to smile again. I want to be known for my smile and not the haunted look in my eyes.

What will I need to bring the JOY back? I need a recipe:

1.                  I need to paint

2.                 I need to create

3.                 I need to listen to music

4.                 I need to sing at the top of my lungs to what I want to sing

5.                 I need to play music that I enjoy

6.                 I need to play period

7.                 I need to find a pile of leaves and jump in it

8.                 and lie in them – leaf angel?

9.                 I need to enjoy my food

10.             I need to enjoy sleep

11.               I need to allow myself to spend time with my friends

12.             I need to allow myself time to do what I love most

13.              I need to carve some pumpkins

14.             I need to laugh

15.              I need to look forward to regular things

16.             I need to slow down

17.              I need to smile regardless of the return

18.             I need a thunderstorm to get caught in

19.             I need to enjoy what I enjoy even if others think I’m mad.

20.            I need to stop acting like what I think others want me to be.

Be joyful always

1 Thessalonians 5:16 (NIV)